Hey friends!

I’m so excited to be writing this post for you all! Something that I love talking about here on my blog is self-love. I think self love is an essential element to living a happy, fulfilling life, but I know it can be so hard to show ourselves compassion. Trust me, I’ve struggled to make peace with myself and I still do sometimes. We can be so mean to ourselves, as we know our own flaws better than anyone else. There are things about myself that make me feel incredibly insecure, but I only hurt myself when I pick at my flaws. Even in our deepest insecurities, we should still strive to find ways to appreciate ourselves.

Rather than sitting here and rambling on about “how to love yourself”, I reached out to some inspiring people for their REAL advice and thoughts on self-love. Learning to love yourself, and to be confident in who you are is a process. There’s no “instant fix”. It takes time to learn how to show yourself respect, but it’s a rewarding journey. Here’s advice from people who have been on the journey to self-love. I hope you can find a connection to what someone shared, so that you can begin or continue your journey to self-love too.

“Loving yourself means taking an active approach to self kindness. It means making a choice every day to look at the mirror and say something beautiful to yourself. As if you were speaking to your best friend. Because ultimately, you should be just that, your own best friend.”

– Yvette P., Creator of The Mommy Confessionals

“You’ve only got one body. Love it while you can. Life is too short to spend even a day hating yourself for exactly what you are!”

– Elaine G., Member of CHAARG

“Learn to have a more positive view on things. We all feel a little ‘shitty’ from time to time, but that’s okay. Because that’s what makes us human. But when you decide every morning that it’s gonna be a good day and that you are happy, you feel much better.”

– Ilka B., Creator of Ilka Elise B

“You’re going to have so many ‘before’ bodies and ‘after’ bodies on this journey so you have to learn to fall in love with both of them just the same.” 

– Sara P., Member of CHAARG

“It is okay to be sad about your mummy tummy, and it is okay to be proud about it, it is okay to stick it under spanks and it is okay to let it out in all its glory. Wraps, pills, creams and oils… it’s all bullshit! Wear whatever you want and strut around like the awesome person you are! Because you are not the marks on your tummy, or the extra skin on the side! Don’t be fooled ladies! Buy a great pair of jeans, a fabulous shade of lipstick and strut around like the awesome person you are!”

– Michelle B., Creator of Pumpkins In Trees

“My body is my home and I will not tear it down. My favorite quote to tell myself is ‘you is kind you is smart you is important.'”

– Vanessa F., Member of CHAARG

“You need to be happy with yourself before you try and make any changes like with exercising or dieting. Don’t do crazy exercise regimes because you hate yourself and your body, do it because you want to be the best version of yourself! And never care what other people think about you! Always do what makes you happy because at the end of the day all you have is you!”

– Margaret S., Creator of Marg Fitness

“No matter my history, past mistakes, relationship status, or career choice, I am worthy of love. I am not defined by my past. I am prepared because of it. While my own voice and others may tell me different, I will lean into the safe people that affirm this way of thinking. When I encourage others to love themselves I am encouraging them to treat themselves with kindness, patience, respect, and all that embodies love. We live our life knowing we have worth.”

– So Worth Loving Manifesto (Shared via Kelsie B.)

“Even Beyonce looks in the mirror and sees things she doesn’t like some days. We are our own worst critic. Half of the terrible things you say to yourself are things most people admire about you. You have an entire life to live as you, so you should learn to love her.”

– Brett M., Creator of Wine and Misadventures

“I started loving my body when I started working for “healthy” not “skinny”. Learning to accept that my body type wasn’t a smaller build made my workouts more fun, my eating habits more relaxed, and my confidence skyrocket. I focus on all of the amazing things my body can do, like play volleyball and chase my younger cousin and I appreciate it for all that it is, not what it’s not.”

– Lucy B., Member of CHAARG

“Strive to not compare yourself to others, because we each have completely unique strengths for the purpose of contributing something totally unique to the world. No one else can contribute what you can, so don’t squander the passions and personality that you possess by wishing you were someone else. Support and collaborate with other women rather than competing with them, because we’re all meant to contribute something different to the world.”

– Robin B., Creator of Feather & Flint

“I’ve learned over my health and fitness journey that everyone is different. There is no “one size fits all” method to working out or living a healthy life. So instead of turning to the latest fad diet, cutting out carbs, fat, dairy, gluten, tropical fruits, nightshade foods, acidic foods, beans, peanut butter, or whatever, because it’ll get you “bikini body ready!” or get you a six pack isn’t a healthy way to go into a workout or eating program. What’s more healthy to realize is that everyone is made completely different. Because it works for some people, doesn’t mean it will work for you. In order to live your healthiest life, you have to listen to your body and know what works for YOU instead of what works for other people.”

– Ashleigh M., Member of CHAARG

“When your inner monologue is getting negative, think about what your best friend would say to you instead.”

– Kenzie B., Creator of Kenzient

“I was beating myself up with the image of “perfection”. But honestly? What is perfection? Looking through magazines you see paper thin, makeup full models. Billboards advertise things most of us can’t afford. But where are those happy people that work the jobs they love? Where are those fit, strong women that are starting to make appearances in fit magazines? And where are the women who survived all these terrible things society throws at her. Why isn’t she acknowledged? So you see perfection doesn’t have an image yet. But this is why you create your vision of perfection.”

– Brigita K., Member of CHAARG

“Body positivity has to be more than just about how we look. When we consider beauty as just skin deep we do a dis-service to the concept of beauty. Also once we can truly love ourselves only then can others truly love us.”

– Anya M., Creator of Stuff + Fings

“‘I challenge you to love yourself’ is something I was told by my best friend when I was going through depression, and stress induced anorexia in high school… For a while I couldn’t love myself, I didn’t know how to. I wasn’t taking care of my body at all either. But when I was a senior in high school I was doing things that helped with the stress and I started to take care of my body more. I was exercising more, and eating healthy. And taking care of myself, loving myself, like that I could feel my body loving me right back. Today I am not a skinny girl, but I am a healthy woman, who loves who she is because I know my body loves me too.”

– Sam K., Member of CHAARG

“One aspect of loving yourself that is somewhat overlooked is loving your future self. The idea of investing time effort and resources in your present self in order to make your future self lovable.”

– Lewin C., Creator of The Success Happiness Purpose Freedom Academy

“Treat your body and self with the respect you deserve. Learning to love yourself won’t be an easy process. You’ll cry, sweat, laugh, and every thing else under the sun, but it IS possible and it IS worth it. The strength and confidence you’ll find will be the most amazing reward.”

– Emma S., Member of CHAARG

“In a world where social media is in the forefront it is so easy to feel as if we are not up to par per say. Self love starts mentally and knowing that you are enough and you have great things to offer. We have to learn not to compare ourselves and that is a lesson we learn over and over again. Know and believe that we are enough, beautiful, smart, and capable to do whatever we put our mind to.”

– Shacara L., Creator of Abundance of Beautee

“My junior and senior years of high school I struggled with eating disorders and was at my skinniest. Since getting to college and recovering, sometimes I would look back at old pictures and think of how small I was and I’d get kind of upset that i had gained weight back. But then I remembered how unhappy I was when I was working so hard on denying myself. Even though that body was beautiful, I couldn’t appreciate it because I was too busy focusing on what needed to change. Since I’ve been in college I’ve decided to look at my body and how beautiful it is RIGHT NOW. How happy I am RIGHT NOW. And how good it feels to be strong. You waste your days thinking about tomorrow’s body. Live for now, love for now and you will find peace.” 

– Lily D., Member of CHAARG

“From experience, I have learned that if one is not happy with what they have, they cannot be happy with what they want. It’s kinda basic but applicable to self love. Just humbling appreciation… then it flows on to those around you….from a bud of appreciation. All other things spanning happiness evolves from that radiating inner light.”

– Chrichtian N., Creator of Naturally Me

“Sometimes I forget how many times I’ve picked myself off the floor, how many times I’ve washed away smudgy makeup and put myself to bed. How many times I’ve said no to something unhealthy. Said yes to something good. How many times I’ve treated myself with kindness and patience. I forget how many times I’ve tended to wounds and made peace with my own anger. If i was taking care of a body that was not my own, I’d believe I was doing everything I could. So here’s to remembering that I’m doing the best I can.”

– Tumblr Pigmenting (Shared via Emily B.)

“I learned how to love myself through the practice of yoga. It taught me acceptance of my body and who I am as a person. It also taught me not to compare myself to others and to let go of any negative energy or thoughts about myself. I now love my body and it feels so empowering! My advice for others is to love your body for YOU and not for anyone else. How you feel about yourself matters more than what others feel about you. You ARE beautiful inside and out! Be in awe of your own body and beauty!”

– Jennifer H., Creator of Essentials of a Healthy Life

“Out of all of the billions of combinations of DNA there is only one you or me, for that matter. That means we all have something to offer that the world needs. How can you not feel worthy, meaningful, and beautiful knowing this? Maybe you just have to keep reminding yourself!” 

– Joanna D., Creator of My Therapist Life

“Our bodies (of all shapes, colors, and sizes) are incredible because they carry us through our lives every single day and house our souls… Whenever I’m feeling a bit down about the skin I’m in, I try to take a step back. I remember that my legs help me run long distances, my arms give the best hugs, and my heart allows me to share love, respect, and kindness, and compassion with others AND MYSELF.”

– Erin W., Creator of The Wanderess

“I’ve always felt the bravest, strongest and most confident about myself when I have stepped outside of my comfort zone. I love to travel by myself. It forces me have conversations with folks I would have never connected with if I were traveling with a companion or group. Get uncomfortable and start living!”

– Michelle F., Creator of Cavegirl Cuisine

“You can’t love anyone well if you don’t love yourself first.” To a certain degree all women struggle with self love. Finally, in my mid-twenties, I am learning to love myself! It has been cool to see how I love differently and love better when I love myself!!! To anyone struggling with this just know you are perfect, you are loved, and you are worth it!”

– Adrienne C., Creator of Salt + Light

These were some of my favorites of those that were shared. I hope you were able to resonate with at least one of these quotes and bits of advice. We’re all worthy of self love. I hope you know that you are too.

Naturally,

Ari